Monday, December 8, 2008

Perpetual Motion

Maybe I'm wrong on this, but isn't unemployment supposed to be filled with whimsical and mostly mindless thought, day drinking and an endless amount of time to surf? Joblessness is supposed to equal sucking off the government enough to fuel a mostly uninspired effort to find a new source of self-sufficiency, right? Maybe I'm doing something wrong, but being unemployed is more stressful and quite a bit more draining than the alternative. Seriously, I need a return to normalcy. Time to get a real job so that I can relax a bit.

Between freelance writing, studying, organizing my life, deciding on a career move, trying to keep my finances are far from the red as possible, helping put together a start-up magazine, preparing cover letters, a new quasi-management gig, collecting payment on freelance work, sending out resumes, pitching stories and writing ultra-cheesy statements about my life for applications, finding time for surfing and some semblance of order is proving rather difficult. I guess I could disregard responsibility and simply grow a beard, buy a Moleskin journal, start having a morning cigarette with my coffee, have a brown-bag bottled lunch, hang out on the boardwalk in Laguna Beach and call myself a "starving artist." Eh, it probably wouldn't work out. With Global Warming having a continued effect, the beard would cause unnecessary perspiration, the cigarette smoke and glass bottle would negatively contribute to my carbon footprint, I wouldn't get enough sleep since I'm restless when it's warm out and on top of it all, the shakes I'd get from the caffeine would cause coffee spills on the Moleskin which would smear any works of art I may have created and only prevent any chance of a J.K. Rowling-esque change of fortune.

Cross your fingers that I and the other 500,000 individuals that found themselves newly jobless in November don't fall into the aforementioned unemployment bumhood lifestyle.

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